Over the past few months I have been working with the Wellbeing Project in St Helens, a social enterprise who have developed programmes to improve community mental health and wellbeing. My involvement has been with their “Mothers and Fathers to Be” programme which we piloted last month. This link takes you to a short video about it

At the heart of the work of the Wellbeing Project are the five ways of wellbeing, a set of evidence based actions to improve personal wellbeing developed at The New Economics Foundation. If you’re in Liverpool City Centre you will see them all over the logo for the year of Health and Wellbeing. So what are they?

• Connect: social relationships are crucial to us and yet how much time do we sit in splendid isolation behind computers even sending e mails to our colleagues, friends and family. You know that friend you’ve been meaning to have lunch with for ages but somehow never get round to it, well now’s the time!
• Be active: that doesn’t mean rushing out and joining the nearest gym, it means enjoying a walk, a bike ride or a run. If you haven’t got time believe me after being outside in the fresh air for 20 minutes you will feel better and you will be more effective
• Take notice: how often do you stop to just notice the changing seasons, the beauty in our environment? How often do parents say “I didn’t notice my child grow up”
• Keep learning: Why not try something new or rediscover something you used to do before your life got so busy? There’s always a buzz isn’t there when you achieve something new, a challenge you’ve set yourself
• Give: Giving can be as simple as thanking someone or smiling. I always remember being in the London Underground crammed against everyone else. There was a young woman shorter than me who couldn’t reach to hold on to anything, I leant her my shoulder. It felt good!

One of my clients took up riding at the same time as her daughter; she was connecting with her daughter, being active, learning and while out riding taking notice but also giving something to her daughter. The 5 ways of wellbeing incorporated in one activity

This is simple, enjoyable and it will make you feel physically, mentally and emotionally well. Try it! And I will be using them in my life coaching and in my womens workshops here in Cheshire.

In a recent conversation with a colleague we were bemoaning the fact that people just don’t seem to “get” coaching and would rather go for a quick fix, just as I recently did by taking a day out at a spa near Chester. And it was absolutely lovely but how long does that feeling last? A day? Two days at most. There is no lasting change. I couldn’t count the number of life coaching clients who have said to me over the years “I know I’ll feel better after a holiday”. I remember myself saying exactly the same when I was experiencing mental ill health. Holidays were like an oasis in the chaos of the rest of my life. So I had my holiday and within days it was back to normal. Do you recognize that?

We now know that engaging in a coaching programme over a period of at least three months can deliver real and lasting behavioural change. This is because of the “neuroplasticity” of the brain. For many years we thought that after a certain relatively young age our brains were fixed and there was nothing we could do to change the way we functioned in our lives. But what neural imaging techniques have shown is that we can create new pathways in our brains within three months. Imagine these pathways being channels in the sand; the more water we pour into them the deeper they become. Think the same about these pathways; the more we focus our attention on doing things differently, the more we focus on thinking positively the more ingrained will these pathways become.

I know that the process of life coaching has helped me change my thoughts, feelings and behavior . I have a much more rewarding and fulfilling life and a much more positive outlook and I have seen the same with my clients. A massage, a holiday, a new dress even are fabulous but they don’t give us all of that.