I had my lunch outside today and while I was there experienced the touch of the sun’s warmth, seeing a butterfly drying its wings on the patio, the smell of the hyacinths in my garden, the sound of the birds and of course the taste of my salad. And I appreciated that lovely feel of the first warm spring day.

And I’m reminded of some words I read this week in Anna Pavord’s book “The Curious Gardner”: “A garden gives pleasure, instils calm, grafts patience into your soul.” Because there is something in the outside world, whether it be your garden or in the North york moors where I was at the weekend that is difficult to express in words and that is that sense of feeling connected to something greater than just yourself.

And then I thought of the people who say they just don’t have time. And I feel sad because we all have the same finite amount of time in a day and those experiences are so short lived. It’s about the choices we make on a minute by minute basis, some of which are conscious, some unconscious. It’s about what you say yes to and what you say no to.

I’m talking about mindfulness here, the practice of fully being in and experiencing the present moment. And being outside and experiencing it through your senses as I have been doing is just that. There’s a lot of research that demonstrates the benefits of mindfulness practice to physical and mental wellbeing but just let me share this with you from www.thepowerofpractice.com:-

• “5 minutes a day opens a possibility
• 15 minutes creates a change
• 30 minutes builds a new path
• 1 hour a day changes your world”

For many years I would have resisted the experience I had at lunchtime today or any kind of practice and even envied my friends with dogs .. it gave them the excuse for being outside! I would say I was far too busy and be a victim of my circumstances rather than taking charge of them myself. But now I’m doing things differently and today I have had to say no to something on my to do list so I can say yes to being outside for a few moments.

It’s all about balance and balance is something I have worked long and hard to achieve for myself and now help people achieve it for themselves through coaching.

I have been reading some great books recently and, although I haven’t finished either, I wanted to share some of the learning from both. Now I love learning new stuff and, working in the field of coaching which can be accused of being airy fairy nonsense, it’s great to know that there’s a growing body of knowledge and research out there supporting what I, and other coaches, do. But whether you are a coach or not, if either of these books takes your fancy read them.

The first is Martin Seligman’s book “Authentic Happiness” in which he describes how, having been disenchanted by traditional psychology which he argues is just about the absence of illness, he started to research the idea of positive psychology which focuses on strengths and developing positive emotions. This way of living our lives not only gives us greater fulfilment bur greater longevity! In the book he provides a range of tools to help the reader identify her strengths and an account of the research that underpins it.

The second book is Brene Brown’s “The Gifts of Imperfection”. I was bowled over by her on-line presentation and then bought the book, again, which I’m halfway through. The subtitle of her book is “Let go of who you think you’re supposed to be and embrace who you are”. She describes herself as a shame researcher and discovered that most of us hide our shame because we might be found out for being not as perfect as we think we ought to be. But what she also discovered that those who were living what she describes as “wholehearted” lives had greater happiness and fulfilment. And this was because they had the courage to “put their vulnerability on the line”. They were prepared to be imperfect.

So if there’s a message in this blog let it be this: coaching does work, it’s based on good solid research and it can help you lead happy, rewarding and fulfilling lives.